Marcus Tullius Cicero → Titus Pomponius Atticus
Tradução moderna em inglês
I have learned from your letter what has happened up to the 25th of May; the rest I am awaiting at Thessalonica, as you advised. When that news arrives, I shall be able to decide more easily where to settle. For if there is a case to be made, if something is being done, if I see any hope, I shall either wait here or come to you; but if, as you write, those prospects have evaporated, we shall consider something else. So far you have indicated nothing to me except the discord among those men; yet their quarrel concerns everything rather than me. And so I do not know what good it does me, but nevertheless, so long as you wish me to hope, I shall defer to your judgment.
As for your reproaching me so often and so strongly and saying I am weak in spirit — I ask you, is there any misfortune so great that is not present in my calamity? Has anyone ever fallen from so high a position, in so just a cause, with such gifts of intellect, judgment, and influence, with such support from all good men? Can I forget who I was, yet not feel who I am, what honor I lack, what glory, what children, what fortune, what a brother? Him — and mark this as a new kind of suffering — though I valued him more than myself and always had done, I avoided seeing, lest I should either behold his grief and squalor or present myself, ruined and broken, to him who had left me at the height of prosperity. I pass over the rest, which is unbearable; for I am hindered by weeping. Now, which of the two am I to be accused of — that I grieve, or that I brought things to the point where I did not either hold on to what I had, which would have been easy had not plans for my destruction been hatched within my own walls, or at least not lose it while still alive?
I have written this so that you might comfort me, as you do, rather than think me deserving of reproof or rebuke. And for that reason I write less to you, both because I am hindered by sorrow and because I have more to await from your end than I have to write myself. When that news arrives, I shall inform you of my decision. I would like you, as you have done so far, to write to me about as many matters as possible, so that I am completely ignorant of nothing.
Given on the 18th of June, at Thessalonica.
Texto latino / grego
Acta quae essent usque ad a. d. viii Kal. Iunias cognovi ex tuis litteris; reliqua exspectabam, ut tibi placebat, Thessalonicae. quibus adlatis facilius statuere potero ubi sim. nam si erit causa, si quid agetur, si spem videro, aut ibidem opperiar aut me ad te conferam; sin, ut tu scribis, ista evanuerint, aliquid aliud videbimus. omnino adhuc nihil mihi significatis nisi discordiam istorum; quae tamen inter eos de omnibus potius rebus est quam de me. itaque quid ea mihi prosit nescio sed tamen quoad me vos sperare vultis vobis obtemperabo. [2] nam quod me tam saepe et tam vehementer obiurgas et animo infirmo esse dicis, quaeso, ecquod tantum malum est quod in mea calamitate non sit? ecquis umquam tam ex amplo statu, tam in bona causa, tantis facultatibus ingeni, consili, gratiae, tantis praesidiis bonorum omnium concidit? possum oblivisci qui fuerim, non sentire qui sim, quo caream honore, qua gloria, quibus liberis, quibus fortunis, quo fratre? quem ego, ut novum calamitatis genus attendas, quom pluris facerem quam me ipsum semperque fecissem, vitavi ne viderem, ne aut illius luctum squaloremque aspicerem aut me quem ille florentissimum reliquerat perditum illi adflictumque offerrem. Mitto cetera intolerabilia; etenim fletu impedior. hic utrum tandem sum accusandus quod doleo, an quod commisi ut haec non aut retinerem, quod facile fuisset nisi intra parietes meos de mea pernicie consilia inirentur, aut certe vivus non amitterem? [3] haec eo scripsi ut potius relevares me, quod facis, quam ut castigatione aut obiurgatione dignum putares, eoque ad te minus multa scribo quod et maerore impedior et quod exspectem istinc magis habeo quam quod ipse scribam. quae si erunt adlata, faciam te consili nostri certiorem. tu, ut adhuc fecisti, quam plurimis de rebus ad me velim scribas, ut prorsus ne quid ignorem. data xiiii Kal. Quintilis Thessalonicae.
Texto inglês de origem
Your letter has posted me up in political news to May 25: and I am awaiting the course of events at Thessalonica, as you suggest. When I hear more, I shall know where to be. For if there is any excuse, if anything is being done, if I see a ray of hope, I shall either wait here or pay you a visit: but if, as you say in your letter, those hopes have vanished into air I shall look for something else. At present you do not give me the least hint of anything except the disagreement of those friends of yours: and they are quarrelling about anything rather than me, so I do not see what good it will do me. But, as long as you wish me to hope, I will bow to your wishes. You frequently reproach me strongly for weak-heartedness: but I should like to know if I have been spared any hardship in my misfortune. Did anyone ever fall from such a high estate in such a good cause, especially when he was so well endowed with genius and good sense, so popular and so strongly supported by all honest men? Can I forget what I was? Can I help feeling what I am? Can I help missing my honour and fame, my children, my fortune and my brother? That is a fresh misfortune for you to contemplate. ipsum semperque fecissem, vitavi ne viderem, ne aut illius luctum squaloremque aspicerem aut me, quem ille florentissimum reliquerat, perditum illi adflictumque offerrem. Mitto cetera intolerabilia; etenim fletu impedior. Hic utrum tandem sum accusandus, quod doleo, an quod commisi, ut haec aut non retinerem, quod facile fuisset, nisi intra parietes meos de mea pernicie consilia inirentur, aut certe vivus non amitterem? Haec eo scripsi, ut potius relevares me, quod facis, quam ut castigatione aut obiurgatione dignum putares, eoque ad te minus multa scribo, quod et maerore impedior et, quod exspectem istinc, magis habeo, quam quod ipse scribam. Quae si erunt allata, faciam te consilii nostri certiorem. Tu, ut adhuc fecisti, quam plurimis de rebus ad me velim scribas, ut prorsus ne quid ignorem. Data XIIII Kal. Quintiles Thessalonicae.